16 theoretically terrifying movie biker gangs
http://www.avclub.com/articles/we-want-to-be-free-to-ride-our-machines-without-be,30244/
By. Keith Phipps
July 13, 2009
1. The Black Rebels Motorcycle Club, The Wild One (1953)
The Stanley Kramer-produced The Wild One is today better remembered
for Marlon Brando's iconic performance as the leader of the rowdy
Black Rebels Motorcycle Club than any other element. And rightly so.
Brando's famous response to "What are you rebelling
against?""Whaddaya got?"captures the free-floating wanderlust and
rebellion that helped inspire the post-war spike in biker gangs. But
the film surrounding it is pretty tedious, and Brando's gang seems
more rude than dangerous. What's more, Brando's great crime,
possessing a stolen trophy, won't exactly make anyone lose sleep. He
didn't even steal it himself, and at heart, he's just a misunderstood
kid looking to settle down.
2. The Wild Angels, The Wild Angels (1966)
The mid-'60s saw a spike in interest in biker gangs in general and
the Hell's Angels in particular, thanks in part to Hunter S.
Thompson's exposé Hell's Angels: The Strange And Terrible Saga Of The
Outlaw Motorcycle Gangs. In his first-hand account of life with the
San Francisco and Oakland chapters of the famed gang, Thompson uses
pinpoint precision to detail the biker lifestyle. The book captures
both the calculated outrage of adopting Nazi emblems and some truly
shocking bursts of crime and violence.
Never one to let a trend pass him by, Roger Corman decided to make
what would become ground zero for an explosion of biker movies.
Taking an effortless, New Wave-inspired approachsure, Bonnie And
Clyde gets all the creditCorman follows a few eventful days in the
life of a club led by Peter Fonda, playing a character named Heavenly
Blues. When his second-in-command, Loser (Bruce Dern), is injured,
The Wild Angels' antisocial tendencies come to the fore. When he
dies, they explode in a deeply memorable sequence in which a funeral
service turns into a drug-and-alcohol-fueled orgy that doesn't leave
out the corpse.
Up until that finale, Corman's film doesn't really make The Wild
Angels seem dangerous so much as nasty. The party scenes place a
greater emphasis on whooping, hollering, and surf-music rock than
real excess. But an undercurrent of sexual danger remains present at
all times. Left a biker widow, Dern's girlfriend (played by Dern's
real-life partner, Diane Ladd) becomes vulnerable and desperate to
avoid becoming a "mama," a woman who acts as common property for the
gang. Fonda has a long, angry, philosophical dialogue with a preacher
that makes his membership seem like a matter of principled
non-conformity. But the church desecration that follows feels
transgressive in the ugliest way possible, and the final scenes find
Fonda looking hollowed-out and lost. If there's some middle ground
between settling down and hanging out with a bunch of sleazeballs, he
can't find it.
3. The Hell's Angels (first fictional version), Hells Angels On Wheels (1967)
The Hell's Angels were the obvious inspiration behind most onscreen
biker gangs. Sometimes they even turned up in the movies themselves:
Real-life Angels played extras in The Wild Angels. In Hells Angels On
Wheels, the San Francisco and Oakland chapters, including leader
Sonny Barger, fill out the cast in a movie ostensibly about the
Hell's Angels, though the title didn't get the name exactly right.
Directed by Richard Rush, later of Stunt Man fame, Hells Angels On
Wheels ups the ante on biker outrage by capturing some of the
man-on-man tongue-kissing the Angels would bring out to shock the
squares. Jack Nicholson plays a peevish gas-station
attendant/motorcycle enthusiast who stands up to some bikers when
they break his headlight. Impressed, they let him hang around with
them, and he soon feels the benefits of having the Angels on his
side. Their leader (Barger look-alike Adam Roarke) doesn't seem to
mind that his girlfriend (Sabrina Scharf) wants to show Nicholson a
good time, even beyond the expected body-painting-and-bongo-rock
orgies. Also, they defend him from some bullying sailors. True, they
kill one of the sailors, then later run an old man off the road to
his death, just because he happened to be in the way. Which leaves
Nicholson to wonder whether he was better off at the gas station
after all. He becomes a variation on Fonda's existential Wild Angels
hero, a misfit in the square world, and dissatisfied with the
alternative. Still, the movie makes the Hell's Angels look like the
gang to hang with for anyone wanting to engage in chain fights in
empty swimming pools.
4. The Black Souls, The Glory Stompers (1968)
Jody McCreaJoel McCrea's son, most famous as Deadhead in the Beach
Party moviesstars as a good kid who nonetheless likes running with a
gang called The Glory Stompers. And why not? It means the thrill of
the open road and the requisite outdoor biker parties featuring go-go
dancing, vaguely surf-like music, and lots of jiggly women in bras
and hot pants. But he's confronted with the dark side of biker life
pretty quickly after pissing off the Black Souls, a mean-tempered
gang led by a heavily bearded Dennis Hopper. They beat him up, leave
him for dead, and steal his woman with the intent to sell her into
slavery in Mexico, as bike gangs do. The Black Souls are a bad bunch,
but fortunately for McCrea's rescue efforts, they're plagued by
infighting and prone to be distracted by parties in which women ride
around topless, a sight the film captures from an extremely discreet distance.
5. The Born Losers, The Born Losers (1967)
Meaner and more rape-happy than the average movie biker gang, even
though one of their members looks like a stereotypical beatnik and
their hangout includes a big poster of James Dean, the Born Losers
announce their intention to offend everyone via the emblem on their
jackets: a naked woman hanging on a cross. They're dangerous at any
time, and even more so when hanging out in a coastal California town
that's a favorite for vacationing college students. After a rape
spree that leaves three women hospitalized, and one babbling like an
idiot, the Born Losers appear to have pushed their life of crime and
destruction too far. Fortunately for them, they're dealing with the
most incompetent police force this side of Jackie Gleason's anti-Bear
squad. Unfortunately, they're also dealing with a badass local named
Billy Jack (Tom Laughlin, who later revived the character for Billy
Jack and its sequels) who won't stand for their raping ways. After
one rape too many, he makes sure the gang will never ride, or rape, again.
6. The Devil's Advocates (non-werewolf chapter), Run, Angel, Run! (1969)
Even as movie bikers go, Angel (William Smith) is a total asshole. As
Run, Angel, Run! opens, he's sold out his buddies in the
not-so-frighteningly named The Devil's Advocates by selling their
secrets to Like magazine for $10,000. Stuck in jail, he calls on his
girlfriend (Valerie Starrett) to bail him out by turning some tricks.
When she shows up with more than the required $80, he asks, "What'd
you do? Form an assembly line?" Again: asshole. His old gang,
however, is filled with even bigger assholes who chase him up the
California coast, occasionally in split-screen (this being a movie
from 1969, after all). Eventually Smith starts to see the appeal of
the straight life, thanks to a biker-turned-farmer (Dan Kemp) who
takes him in. And how does Kemp get repaid for helping? The Devil's
Advocates turn up and rape his daughter. The moral of the story:
Never assist a Devil's Advocate. If he doesn't rape a loved one, one
of his former buddies will.
7. Man-Eaters, She-Devils On Wheels (1968)
Unlike most biker gangs, the all-female, L.A.-based Man-Eaters
seemingly formed a bike club primarily to compete. Or maybe that
should be secondarily. The club's members race each other weekly, in
events where the bikes seem to reach speeds in excess of 30 or 40
mph. (Director Herschell Gordon Lewis never really masters the racing
sequences.) Then, under the direction of a leader named Queen (Betty
Connell), they pair off with a group of male biker groupies for an
orgy, with the winner of the race getting first pick, and the loser
getting the dregs. It's kind of like a scuzzy variation on Mystery
Date. Unfortunately, a rival male gang has it out for them, and
murders their adorable, pint-sized mascot Honey Pot (Nancy Lee
Noble). But even though they sport a logo of a pussycat wearing a
bowtie, the Man-Eaters do not go down easily. Soon they're stringing
wires across the road to decapitate their enemies, a technique that
allows Lewisbetter known for films like Two Thousand Maniacs! and
Blood Feastto break out some of his patented gore.
8. The Satans, Satan's Sadists (1969)
This low-, low-budget movie from Al Adamson (the cheapie specialist
behind Psycho A Go-Go, and later, Doctor Dracula) features a truly
brutal gang led by Russ Tamblyn. Wearing granny glasses and a floppy
hat that makes him look more like Chuck Barris than Charles Manson,
Tamblyn and his gang of nogoodniks take over a desert diner and
commence raping and killing everyone in sight, when not delivering
speeches about middle-American hypocrisy. ("Even though I got a lot
of hate inside, I got friends who ain't got hate inside. They're
filled with nothin' but love. Their only crime is growing their hair
long, smokin' a little grass…") But Tamblyn and a gang that also
includes "Firewater" (his name is a respectful homage to his Native
American heritage) and "Acid" (who likes acid) prove no match for an
Army vet who takes them out while expressing regrets for his actions.
"Oh Christ," he exclaims after killing Tamblyn. "At least in Vietnam,
they paid me…"
9. Hell's Angels (second fictional version), Hell's Angels '69 (1969)
Apparently okay with Hells Angels On Wheels' portrayal of them as
casually murderous thugs, the Oakland chapter of the Hell's Angels
signed on to play themselves in another movie. But in spite of the
title, they're clearly supporting players in what's essentially a Las
Vegas heist movie with a biker twist. Director Lee Madden shepherds
stars/co-writers Tom Stern and Jeremy Slate through a story in which
they play Hollywood playboys who decide to rip off Caesars Palace
just for kicks. Their convoluted plan involves posing as vacationing
Boston-area bikers, then befriending some Hell's Angels too dimwitted
to see past their pretty-boy hair and lame club name: The Salem
Witches. (Really?) Then they check into a casino and trick the Angels
into causing a commotion while they rob it. Does double-crossing a
bunch of bikers with names like Terry The Tramp and Tiny (plus Sonny
Barger) work out well? No, it does not. Madden apparently liked the
milieu well enough to return the following year with…
10. The Exiles (or the Nomads), Angel Unchained (1970)
The Arizona-based Exiles (or Nomads; their jackets have both names on
the back) aren't really a bad bunch. They mostly like to booze and
get high, and in a striking opening scene, battle other bikers at an
abandoned amusement park. But the lifestyle has started to wear on
Don Stroud, who amicably parts ways with his biking comrades a few
minutes into the film. Opting for a more sedate existence, he settles
down with some hippies at a commune run by Luke Askew. There, Stroud
hooks up with a beguiling, free-spirited lass (future TV cop Tyne
Daly). But when some hippie-hating, dune-buggy-riding locals decide
to run the hippies out of town, Stroud has little choice but to call
on his old pals to ensure peace and love the old-fashioned way:
through violence. Also on board is the tastefully nicknamed Injun,
who keeps the bikers happy with drug-laced cookies.
11. Unnamed toughs, The Cycle Savages (1969)
The Bruce Dern-led gang of The Cycle Savages don't appear to have a
name, but they do have a clear M.O. The terror of the Los Angeles
suburbs, they cruise the streets looking for adventurous hippie
chicks, then selling them into a prostitute ring run by Dern's
brother (Casey Kasem). It's a sweet operation, so it's understandable
that Dern would guard it with a paranoid intensity. After Dern
catches a clean-cut young artist (Chris Robinson) drawing his gang in
the middle of a stompdown, he decides that this "uncool" behavior
should be punished, lest the police use the drawings against them.
(Either Dern has a faulty understanding of the law, or the film takes
place in an alternate universe where drawings can be admitted as
evidence. Maybe in a sequel, dogs stand trial for their illegal poker
games.) "I'm going to show you that I can do a little artwork, too,"
Dern hisses before cutting Robinson with a razor. But after 90
minutes of tortured overacting, only one of them is left to sketch
the death scene. (Hint: It isn't Dern.)
12. The Dragons, Angels Hard As They Come (1971)
The uneasy relationship between bikers and the counterculture gets
explored again in a script co-written by a young Jonathan Demme.
Here, a group of drug-dealing bikers called The Angels (an
organization with no apparent hellish association) tries to lay low
after a drug deal goes awry. Three Angels, including the soulful Long
John (Scott Glenn) decide to hang out in a ghost town populated by
hippies, including a fresh-faced Gary Busey, and another bike gang
called The Dragons. All seems to be going well, and Glenn and a woman
who catches his eye even have a rap session, mellowing out the vibes
by breaking down the stereotypes about hippies and bikers. ("Shit,
I've never been to Altamont.") Only problem: The Dragons are fucking
nuts. When one of the hippie women dies in a round of group sex gone
terribly wrong, The Dragons get all paranoid and assume that the
Angels are trying to assassinate their leader. Soon, The Dragons
begin subjecting the Angels to a sadistic game of Chopperball, which
is kind of like polo, but with bikes instead of horses and people
instead of balls.
13. The Devil's Advocates (werewolf chapter), Werewolves On Wheels (1971)
In a movie that doesn't fully make good on its title until the
closing moments, a group of bikers that includes "Eve Of Destruction"
singer Barry McGuire (as "Scarf") run into some satanic monks. As
their ranks become afflicted with a bad case of lycanthropy, they
have to struggle with whether their new desire to bite, howl, and
kill conflicts with their highway-riding, yokel-terrorizing
lifestyle. Unsurprisingly, it doesn't.
14. The Devil's Advocates (Vietnam chapter, also non-werewolf), The
Losers (a.k.a. 'Nam's Angels) (1970)
The biker-movie cycle rolled out alongside the Vietnam War, an
entanglement mentioned in many of the films. But only one biker movie
took place inside Vietnam. Directed by Jack Starrett (fresh off Run,
Angel, Run!), The Losers sends five beer-swilling bikersswastika
regalia and allupriver on a covert mission to rescue a CIA agent
(also played by Starrett). Why bikers? "Speed's all you've got going
for you." Well, speed and a bunch of Yamahas outfitted with machine
guns and armor. Biker-movie vets William Smith and Adam Roarke help
lead a charge that results in more biker-on-Viet Cong carnage than
any movie ever made. Surprisingly, Vietnam has a lot more
cycle-friendly ramps than might be expected. Also, Red Chinese
soldiers are surprisingly generous in supplying their prisoners with
mind-bending weed.
15. The Black Six, The Black Six (1973)
When a white bike gang kills a kid for the crime of dating a white
woman, in swoop The Black Six, a gang of six Vietnam-vet bikers who,
as their name suggests, are black. (They're also played by
professional football players, including "Mean" Joe Greene. The
opening credits even list their team affiliation.) And that, in
short, is the whole plot. But there's a lot more to these guys than
righteous rage. When not avenging a fallen friend, they like to hang
out on farms, helping widows, tossing bales of hay, and cuddling
goats. They're sweet, reallyuntil they encounter racism. Then they
become total bad-asses. And in this film, they encounter
badass-inducing racism a lot, between loonnnngg scenes of driving
around to generic Shaft-funk. The film has one foot in the biker
genre and one foot in the blaxploitation world, a sign that new types
of heroes and villains were starting to take over.
16. Satan's Helpers, Pee-wee's Big Adventure (1985)
Ways in which the Satan's Helpers may punish you if you make them
angry: hanging, killing, stomping, tattooing, and/or time alone with
an imposing biker mama. Ways to escape: Perform a lively dance to The
Champs' 1958 hit "Tequila."
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